The new video I have posted was sent to me by a dear friend. I believe she first heard it on her way home after my mom's funeral. I think it is an excellent song and appropriate for what life has been for the last few months.

I was finally able to talk to the detective today. Nothing new from him. He is waiting on results from the recent DNA samples he sent to the Crime Lab. Wonder how long that wait will be? Days? Weeks? Months? A year, or more?

I planned a meeting with the detective this week. My husband is going with me for support. Hopefully I will know more after then; I know I will have at least one question answered (I will post more on that after I go). I am anticipating a very difficult meeting emotionally, but I feel I am as ready for it as I can be.

I ask you to continue to remember me and my family in your prayers. Even though I have more good days than I did a few months ago, the hard days still bring me to my knees at times. I think my mind has grown accostomed to the thoughts and concept of what happened, but my heart still hurts so much.

I have finally achieved one of my lifelong dreams, becoming a nurse. . . something I have wanted to do since I was 4 years old! I know my mom would be so proud of me. I am saddened that she is not here to share in this experience.

Video

Turn your sound up a bit and you can hear the music that accompanies the video I have added to my blog.

The song is "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter. I chose this song because I remember hearing this song shortly after my mom's death and thinking if anyone ever had a bad day, it was definitely her. Since then, everytime I hear this song I immediately think about my mom and all that has happened. Often times it can still make me cry.

I plan to change the videos periodically, so if you have any ideas let me know (Thanks LKJ!).

Again, thanks for continuing to read my blog and passing the blog address along to others.

I have not been posting as regularly as I was simply because I have nothing new to tell or report. This whole process has been so frustrating and exhausting.

I have not talked to the detective this week, although I have attempted to each day. I can probably guess what he will say to me, but I still need to hear it from him.

I'm sure I have posted a comment similar to this before, but making sure my mom's murder(s) is/are caught and have their day in court is the last thing I can do for her.

My mom and I had always been so close. It was almost like we grew up together, as she was only 19 when I was born. I considered her my best friend for many years, we talked several times each day.

A couple of years ago things began to change. Our lives took different paths. She made some choices that I did not approve of and I felt I needed to protect my family, especially my child. At times we were barely even civial to one another. The last time I saw her it was much better. I think we had both begun to accept the other's position and point of view, even though we may not have approved.

Making sure her killer(s) is/are found is the LAST thing I can do to let her know how much I loved her, even though we did have our differences.

Dreams

I have started my first job as a nurse. For a few weeks I will be working every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night; which means I sleep all weekend days. I tell you all that to tell you this: I have had very few dreams since my mom died, and none of her. I have had dreams of her funeral and stuff, but that's been about it. Well, over the weekend (who knows what day, they all blend together) I dreamed I was at some family gathering and my mom walked into the door. I was never able to see her face or hear her voice, but I saw the rest of her.

I think I probably had this dream because I (nor anyone else) ever saw her body. Somewhere maybe I have some hope that it was not her.

Another Day

I talked with the detective yesterday. He used the phrase "slim pickins" when describing my mom's case. I don't think I was surprised to hear that. I'm beginning to wonder if this case will ever be solved. I can only hope and pray it is. I feel assured my mom's killer will face justice eventually. It may not be here on earth, but whoever did this will have to meet their Maker sooner or later.

At earlier times when I've thought about her murder remaining unsolved, I would almost become crazy (for lack of a better word). Last night as I was thinking about my conversation with the detective, and I think I may can accept that ("slim pickins"). Is it okay with me? Definitely not, but I have to accept what is and realize I can do nothing to change it. The last thing I could give my mother would be justice, but it is out of my control. I have done everything I know to do and talked to everyone I can think of to help, all to no avail.

I am powerless in this situation and have no control over what may or may not happen. I cannot let this ruin me, but accepting this reality is almost like losing her and what could have been all over again.

Again, I thank you for reading and passing the link to my blog along to others.

Nancy Grace

I don't know if anyone else saw it, but Nancy Grace did profile my mom's murder today. I am glad we got that media attention. I was talking with the detective about it, and I made the comment that it probably wouldn't help any. He told me to take whatever media time we can get. He said you never know who is watching.

I liked the way Nancy Grace referred to my mom as a "lovely lady." She also mentioned that my mom's murder took place near her hometown. Maybe something will come from this. Let's hope and pray it does.

I did talk to the detective today. I started the conversation by apologizing for any trouble I may have caused him. He chuckled and said it was okay and not to worry about it. After my apology he began to talk to me in the manner he did before my letter was in the Macon Telegraph. He encouraged me to be patient; I don't know of any other choice I have.

Update

I haven't posted in the last few days because I have nothing to post. I know no more than I did last time.

Tomorrow on Nancy Grace's program Closing Arguments, that airs on CourTV, my mom's profile is scheduled to show sometime from 3pm-5pm. Carole Sund Foundation told me to expect it to be about 2 minutes long. It may get bumped from tomorrow's show, depending on what else may be going on; if it does not air, it will be re-scheduled.

Still no word on when it will be broadcast on Nancy Grace's program on Headline Prime. I will pass along the date and time of that as soon as I know it.

I have not talked with the detective since the last posting, but I have left messages for him to call me.

I will update the blog when and if I have new information or something of interest to share. Thanks for reading and passing on my blog address.

To the best of my knowledge, there have been no changes in the status of my mom's case.

One evening this week I received a phone call from someone who knew my mother. This person had some information they turned over to the detective. I don't know if any of it will help, time will tell. This person gave me an idea of some of the stuff they have. It only confuses me more, but it does give me more insight into the person my mom was before her murder.

From this person I learned the detective got into some trouble as a result of my letter that was in the Sunday paper. I thought he acted differently this week when I talked to him, more official and business-like than before. I never intended to get him in trouble, but reading the letter now after I've had some time to calm down, I can see how that might happen. Guess next time I talk to him I'll have to apologize.

According to recent news reports, the city of Macon may have to borrow $5 million to make payroll. Will the detective get additional help? I seriously doubt it.